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Coaching Family & Friends

weekly roundup Jun 12, 2020

Can I work with friends and family? If so, how?

Garrett - My coach who worked with me around client issues (and is a LMFT) said that it depends on the type of work that you are doing with them. Therapists aren't allowed (or shouldn't) have personal relationships with their clients, due to the type of work their doing. As a financial coach, it's possible to focus only on the numbers (although I don't think it's that effective) or be on the other side of the spectrum and dive deep into a persons patterns/emotions/behaviors around money (what Deborah Price does in her Certified Money Coach training).

The deeper the work you do with someone, I believe the more discerning you need to be about drawing that line. Because people will be revealing very personal information to you, not just around money but their goals, fears, etc. This can complicate relationships with friends/family because they'll know you know parts about them that even their partners might not know, and can change the dynamic of how they interact with you (potentially).

Talked But Never In-Depth

Christine - it's funny, I have close friends who I know have money issues but we've only met like once for coaching and never really deep dived into them. I feel bad and I know I can help them but I never push them into working with me. I mean they know what I do so if they're comfortable, they'll sign up. It's a fine line.

Can't Help the Unwilling 

Veit - I feel like I can work with anyone that wants help. With anyone you approach or ask for help you can only help them if they want help. You can lay out a plan all day long into the future and if they do not want to follow the plan there is nothing you can really do to help them. Some folks just do not know that a plan exist and when you present it they have to want to say good by to the old life of credit/debt and a new life of financial freedom.

Friendship/Family > Money 

Melanie - I have worked with friends several times. What I have found is most of them were not ready to do the work. I let them know it's their lives and their finances and that if they decide it's not the right time or they "don't have time" just let me know so I can end the agreement; I say this and make them aware of the refund/cancellation policy upfront. I didn't want them avoiding me. So when they let me know I said ok, because it was. And I let it go and we continued on as friends/family. Funny they would from time to time bring it up about getting back on it without me ever mentioning it. But I wait for them to actually make an appointment on their own. I don't try to convince them to.

I'm very good at keeping business and personal in the right place so it works for me. Just they haven't been the best clients.


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